Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Still Waiting

I'd like to say that there is something about waiting that brings out the worst in me, but that wouldn't be true.  The truth is the waiting... and waiting... and waiting... actually just reveals some of the worst things about me.  Oh, I desperately need my Savior.  Impatient, selfish, demanding, short tempered, self-centered... Did I say impatient already?  Ok.  So, I'm confessing this, facing it and even glorifying God for it because the worst thing for me to do is to begin to think I've got it all together and can handle life on my own.

We've been reading through most of the Old Testament in school this year and the overwhelming theme is that God has a good law, set in place for the benefit of His chosen people.  Over and over they stray from his good path but when he reveals to them how far off they are from His perfect plan and they repent, turn away from their own paths, and follow him again, he is so quick to give grace and lead them again. 

God, I need your grace.  You've seen this ugliness all along.  Thank you for revealing it to me.  Thank you for using such a blessing as the coming of another child to train me.  Let me be moldable and responsive to this revelation.  Forgive me for my self-centeredness.  May I overflow with love like you describe... patient, kind, does not envy, does not boast, is not proud, does not dishonor others, not self seeking, is not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs, does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth, always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres, never fails.

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Lord, lift me above my own narrow horizons, that I might fulfill your true vision for me. - B.J. Hoff