I wanted something miraculous to come out of my mouth. It didn't. I prayed again, "Lord, you have me here for a reason. Please use me to bless this person. If you need me for anything, here I am."
So we talked. Well, mostly he talked. He told me about his situation, that his wife died a few years back and his relationships with his kids is very strained now, obviously in part because of all that's going on with his body. (I'm always confused with what gender to refer to in these situations but when I looked into his eyes I saw a man so, even though outwardly he was looking more and more like a woman, I will refer to him as a man still.) He told me they discovered his abnormality not to long ago and it really explained a lot of things in his life. The big irony here is that I just watched a show about the XXY chromosome disorder, also known as Klinefelter's syndrome. This didn't make me an expert by any means but I felt like I was prepared with some thoughts about how children or spouses might be affected or how similar or dissimilar this might be from Faith's extra 18th chromosome.
Well, long story short, after he told me quite a bit about his life and his family, he started to gather up his trash and was saying his goodbyes. By this time the girls were off playing as well and it was only Eliza and I. I scooted Eliza over and slid into his booth. There had been many prayers sent up by this point. I smiled at him and said as honestly as I could, "You know, I've been trying to respond to God and listen to the Holy Spirit in my life and I was wondering if I could pray with you right now?" "Oh," he said, "I prayed this morning." "Well could we pray together right now? I wanted to pray for your family and your relationship with them." "Well, you know," he boldly said, "I'm a Captist." My little hamster wheel began spinning in my head, "A what?" "You know, a Catholic/Baptist." "Oh." I'm thinking what does that have to do with anything and what does it even mean? So I said, "Well, would you be comfortable praying with me real quick?" "No, not really." So there I was, denied in McDonalds. Ahh, but I will not be thwarted. After thanking him for spending some time talking with me I reminded him that I would be praying for him today.
So, wherever you are right now, Mr. Humanbeing-on-a-hard-journey-through-life, I am praying for you. I'm praying for rest and consistency in your body, for healing in your relationships with your family, and for the eternal hope that Jesus Christ offers to be truly known in your heart. I don't know why bright lights didn't flash and direct revelation didn't happen today but I hope that somehow through our interrupted, distraction filled conversation that you felt the love of God and remembered that you are his beloved child.
And that's the end of the story. Was that time wasted, a failed attempt at responding to the Holy Spirit? Was I only responding to my own thoughts?
Matthew 22:36-40 "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul
and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the
second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the
Prophets hang on these two commandments."
Someday I may have a miracle story to share, someday I may be used to lead someone to Christ, but I know that I love God with my whole heart and today I loved my neighbor in the booth next to mine at McDonalds. Everything else is up to Him.