Tuesday, July 29, 2008

What Now?

Each day that passes by without some firm commitment from the two parties that are interested in the business, the more I feel like God is telling us, "Wait." Not so much, "Wait just a minute" like it's been for the past several months, but more of a "Wait, this will be in my time and we've got some work to do in the meantime." So, I'm taking a deep breath and trying to see the situation for what it is. I have to admit that the thrill of having such a definite calling and specific goal was wonderful. I felt renewed passion to share the Word of God, to encourage other believers, and mostly to be used more specifically and directly. Now, I want to make sure that we don't settle back into our old daily life. I must remember our calling and I have the opportunity to add more and more experiences that will further prepare us for that calling. Perhaps there is more growth and maturity needed and God knows that our ministry will be more effective with that. Perhaps he has a different plan, a different camp, or just different timing than we first understood. That last sentence was hard to write, specifically about the different plan. I'm not sure if it's because I don't want to be wrong about this or if I just love this plan so much that I don't want to let it go. Deep in my heart I know that all these trials, this waiting time and unknown, will work together for good. 95% of the calling on our lives has not changed; we are to passionately share the Word of God and encourage other believers. Presently my specific calling is as a mom of 3, making our house a home, preparing for #4 and our first year of homeschooling, whose mission field includes ministering to friends, family, neighbors, grocery store clerks, YMCA life guards, and Bush Park dog walkers, just to name a few. So how can I be a missionary right here in my ordinary neighborhood, with not much to offer? (You know... it's not camp!) That is what I'm looking at and praying about right now. Our church presents many opportunities to serve both at church and in the community. I'm sure as we look there will be local opportunities through the American Missionary Fellowship both in coming alongside other missionaries and in starting our own ministries. Of all these opportunities, which ones will be the best fit for me and for the family right now where we're at?

I am disappointed that it looks like camp is not happening immediately, but I'm excited for how God will use me right now, right where I am. Also, I'm still ready if the camp plan does come together in the near future. We continue on, waiting on the Lord and trusting his plan.

Lord, if your answer to us right now is, "Wait", help us not to waste
it. This isn't my first choice, I want to go, and I think we're ready,
but your perspective and understanding, your plan, is so much better than my
very best thoughts. Help us not to get discouraged or forget your call on
our lives but instead to prepare for the fulfillment of that calling. Make it clear to us how to serve you right now and where to spend our time, efforts, and money so that we most glorify you. Thank you God for renewed vision. Amen!

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Lord, lift me above my own narrow horizons, that I might fulfill your true vision for me. - B.J. Hoff