Thursday, March 6, 2008

Sick day


This picture is from better days. I woke up sick this morning. In fact, I tossed and turned with the sickness last night and what sleep I did get was interrupted by the girls trading off with their own sicknesses. I had planned to work out with a friend today but now I'm spending my time responding to the whining voices of my patients, bringing fresh water, ice packs, and medicine and playing, Cinderella, Cinderella II, and Cinderella III over and over again. I wish someone was taking care of me and putting my favorite movies in. Feeling sick and sleep deprived and then dealing with sickness is not fun but really my frustration is that I was finally getting that workout schedule in place and the sicknesses are sidelining that. My daily devotions from Proverbs 31 ministries came this morning and what do you know! The author was dealing with the same sicknesses and frustrations. Coincidence? I don't think so. Read it for yourself if you'd like.

It helped me to recognize my feelings of entitlement and selfishness. Last night I caught portions of Supernanny and the one thing I heard the nanny say was "these kids didn't force their way into your family, you wanted to have lots of kids, so don't take your frustrations and parenting shortcomings out on them" or something along those lines. Been there, done that. For today, I am frustrated and disappointed, but nobody asked to be sick. The devotion ended by reminding me that feelings are normal, even frustration, they are apart of how I'm made and the appropriate response to those feelings is to bring them to God rather than let them run wild. It was a good reminder and I love that God doesn't just leave us to get our acts together by ourselves. So, for now, I'm praying for a healthier tomorrow, praising God for our long term health, and asking him to soothe my frustration so I can best take care of everyone and that he'll provide other opportunities to exercise and be with friends.

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Lord, lift me above my own narrow horizons, that I might fulfill your true vision for me. - B.J. Hoff